Dating your teacher college
TOOGAM isn't unduly relying on a personal opinion that it's unfair, as Polygnome read into it.
When I signed up to be a college professor, I never agreed to limit my long-term life options in such a way.For instance: I hasten to add that none of these point to any clear ethical lapse or mistake on your part.In particular, the idea that it is disturbing for a much older (adult) to date a much younger (adult) may be more of a societal taboo/hangup than anything that can be rationally justified.Once I am done with the short-term scenario where I have influence over a person, such an expectation would impose notable cost/harm without really providing significant benefit. Just because it seems unfair to you not to do it doesn't mean its ethical to do it.There are many situations in life where one has to step back and put ethics above the personal [email protected] : There's a difference between morality (right/wrong) and ethics (which has more to do with the expectations of society/culture).And then I know people who've been dating almost 10 students in the past years, and that's not fine to anybody (but the students who get good grades and easy work...)@Yemon: I agree.
I was reading the situation as saying that the potential datee is really out of academia entirely..I forgot that we sometimes write nonacademic recommendation letters.
@kimball - I think it's relevant, as it shows there's a potential less-formal link between the two.
ie there could be more to the relationship than strict "Professor-Student" ties. I don't see a moral issue (IF the power unbalance is now gone - @vadim123's answer below is good), but thought I'd relate this: in my old school, a male teacher had a fling with a female student while she was still a student, and it was frowned upon but nothing more.
I believe they started dating before she graduated, and got married a few years afterwards.
I don't see any sign that this was frowned upon from other department professors.
In this case, society would not be right to expect a professor abide by this particular proposed restriction.