Teachers accomodating temperamental characteristics
Alicia Lieberman, author of The Emotional Life of the Toddler, adds the active toddler to the list.Individual babies fall between and overlap many of the categories: Most babies have a “shy” time around eight months, and many have “difficult” periods, especially as they are about to develop a new skill like crawling or walking. In fact it can have a crippling effect if parents focus on the label instead of their baby’s unique qualities.
Having a strong-willed baby may bring you in touch with who you were, and who you are.I had no one to tell me how much crying was normal.” Having a shaky support system puts a great deal of pressure on the baby-parent fit. Lana’s parents set aside images of easy babies, tidy houses and quiet mealtimes, focused on Lana and her needs, and tried not to take it personally.Sources of support can be as close as a partner or neighbour who will provide a sounding board or baby care – sometimes a very small break will be enough to regain perspective. If it’s too tight across the shoulders, the sleeves don’t go much past your elbows, and the wool is scratchy, you can’t really think about anything but how uncomfortable the sweater is. If the expectations in her environment don’t respect her temperament, if she doesn’t “feel right” because her needs are not accepted, then the creative energy that should go into learning about her world goes instead into struggling with a fit that binds. It took patience, energy and concentration to help Lana through her infancy. He goes to sleep whenever he’s tired, wherever he is.Mary Sheedy Kurcinka, author of Raising Your Spirited Child, suggests that you may have to mourn that dream baby. The only thing to do is say goodbye to the dream child, and focus in a positive way on your real child. Rosemary Liston’s baby, Sarah, was a sensitive soul, and she cried a lot. Acceptance is a wonderful gift – a gift she’ll never outgrow.Liston remembers: “Every time she cried I was hysterical. Lana: “Intense Needs” “Lana wanted to nurse all the time, but the slightest noise bothered her when she nursed. ) nap, there was no way to do anything while she slept because the noise would wake her, screaming. I tried every tape we had, and found John Prine soothed her, though not every time, and not for long.” The parents and the fit: Lana is a baby with lots of needs, and she told her parents about those needs by crying.As parents come to understand the temperament of their child, they have a chance to better understand themselves, too.
A special challenge: the high-need baby Some babies come into the world with an especially intense and sensitive temperament.
When you respond in a positive way, your child learns that he is capable of communicating his feelings, and that he can trust you to help him.
These two lessons are the touchstones of effective parenting. An active baby may be fun and exciting for one parent, but exhausting to another; a baby who seems quiet and “good” to a low-key parent may seem unresponsive to a high-energy extrovert.
“Temperament” describes a baby’s basic disposition or style, like a bias that colours the way she responds to her environment.
This disposition is largely inborn; it may even be obvious (and obviously different from her sibling’s) within days of her birth.
While our basic temperament tends to persist throughout life, this doesn’t mean we don’t change.