The three day rule and dating
Isn't the whole point of dating to find someone you dig and then actually get to talk to and hang out with that person?Makes zero sense to us—and kinda sounds like playing games, which we are so not into.
So, you go out with a great guy, you both have an amazing time, you're clearly really into each other, but then you're both supposed to wait at least three agonizing days to contact each other again?In response, Swider pieced it together quite nicely: “You’re looking for someone who’s a guy’s guy on the surface, but underneath he’s got a little more going on.” I was tempted to slow clap. Just because Christy was interested in being set up doesn’t mean the male community would be interested in letting a stranger send them on dates — especially when TDR’s core demographic is people in their 20s and 30s.After all, if Christy’s having trouble meeting someone, what makes Swider any more qualified, or lucky, even?So, Swider brought me to the networking event, at this nondescript Chelsea office building, to see her in action.Rather than set up gatherings herself, she’ll head to other organizations’ happy hours and business events after meeting with clients all day to source her match pool.“People don’t list ‘rich’ as much as I thought they would,” she confided. Instead, she claims you need to be brave, a good listener, and make people feel at ease.
I was impressed with the way Swider so easily approached people, not beating around the bush for one moment. “You can’t be that elderly woman scaring girls about their biological clocks ticking.” That would be a yenta. Even the ones who weren’t single wanted her card to pass on to friends.
And, these events are a great way to find gainfully employed, passionate, driven people.
Plus, it’s an environment where strangers are expected to approach one another for conversation and exchange information.
They’re not just waiting around for a guy,” added Swider. “I date guys who are nice and smart, but there’s no spark.”If you’ve done any kind of online dating, Swider’s questions probably feel familiar to you.
For the initial consultation — which comes free of both cost and pressure — Swider asked Christy*, a very cool client who agreed to let me sit in on their meeting, a lot of questions. But, the benefit of having a human asking these questions is that you get a chance to explain that which you cannot communicate by ticking boxes on a list.
TDR is throwing that idea out the window, bridging the physical and digital dating worlds with its online and in-person services.